Welcome To The RESORT

House of Ultimate Slack

The Resort is a Geek House in the mountains of Santa Cruz, California. We are a fully network-connected household of seven housemates, who employ the full power of the internet to nag our housemates about chores and otherwise organize our lives. We've been the Resort since 1992 and online fulltime since 1994. In the Future, all houses will be like the Resort. However it is likely that the people in this future will be so busy forwarding mail to their housemates that they will forget to eat, and will thus die.

Our Newest Offerings:
A Sneak Peek At A Past Party
Word Of The Day!
We Love Gin!
NYE Bash

What IS this Place?

Story #1: The Resort is the temple of a religious cult who eat babies and nail young kittens and bullfrogs to trees. Then we vomit on them!
Story #2: The Resort is the home of a group of escaped mental patients. We spend our days making macrame, screaming, and banging against the walls. Please send us some money or some gin; we're running out of martini mix rather quickly.
Story #3: The Resort is the landing zone for the Reptoid invaders. We've taken on human appearances as we infiltrate Earth.

So its time to meet the cultists, inmates, aliens, umm, I mean HOUSEMATES. Click on Aliens in the buttons below to read about the people who make up the resort, then click on Photos to see a photo gallery of our bright smiling faces! Here are the answers to some common questions:
Where were you SPAWNED? How are you on the network? Whats going on at the Resort?

Help, I'm Confused!

Your links back to The Resort

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All Contents Copyright 1992-1997 by The Resort . Give us food, money, beer, or kill us.

The Graven Image of 'Bob' is a registered trademark of the SubGenius Foundation, Inc.